Day +2

Today Derek slept most of the day. He can only get out of bed for about half an hour before he has to get back into bed. He can't hold down any food. His hearing is going as well. They said that was a side affect from the last chemo he did but its becoming more apparent now. Despite being terribly tired and weak he is so optimistic. He never complains and I would think he has a right to. I on the other hand am not quite so good. Sometimes I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. Often times the Lord has to humble me in an already humbling situation. Derek is incredibly inspiring and I am grateful that he is my husband. Camden is use to a lot of attention from Derek but now Derek can not do much for or with Camden. Today I think Camden just had enough from me and was super fussy. I laid him down next to Derek so I could go make him and bottle and when I came back two minutes later he was fast asleep cuddled up next to his daddy. Sometimes mom just won't do and he needs his daddy. Maybe I could do this alone. It doesn't mean I want to.